


Too Far

by saizoswifey



Category: SLBP - Fandom, Samurai Love Ballad Party - Fandom, Samurai Love Ballad: PARTY, 天下統一恋の乱 | Sakura Amidst Chaos | Samurai Love Ballad (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, F/M, Fingering, Lightly Smutty, Mutual Pining, NSFW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2019-04-25 17:43:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14383761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saizoswifey/pseuds/saizoswifey
Summary: MC is in a relationship with Yukimura, but Saizo is in love with her.





	Too Far

     Everything was a sunken dream now. These incessant thoughts were relentless, bouncing around the darkest recesses of his mind,  _unshakable_. His concentration had gone to hell, replaced by thoughts of her. The way she walked, the shape of her brow. The way she looked  _that night_ with her wet hair dangling in thick strands and her bare feet swinging from the veranda and into the cold rainy night. The rainy night he wanted nothing more than to escape alone into until he happened upon  _her_ , and her wet hair and her dangling feet.

     “Peach,” she spoke between chews like a child.

     “So it is. And what are we doing out in the rain all alone?” He tried his best to sound unconcerned, like he didn’t already know the reason why. Refusing to answer him, she simply shrugged.

     “Want some?”

     Saizo took a seat next to her. So close he could feel the slight tremble of her body from the cold and hear the drips from her hair, falling in random onto her shoulders with a  _plunk_. He hadn’t needed to look directly at her to know her eyes were rimmed in red. For a while, he tried desperately to blame it on the rain, and on his impending and perpetual loneliness. The half-eaten peach lay in the palm of her hand and she offered it to him, juices trailing down her wrist carelessly.

     Yet, her lips were parted so slightly and her chest shuddered from crying as she struggled to steady her breathing. Grasping her arm he traced his tongue along her wrist, following the juice and taking a small bite of the peach. He brought his lips to her own to taste the sweet syrup from her mouth. He waited—waited for her to stiffen and pull away. But the peach fell from her limp hand, landing softly and rolling off the edge of the veranda and into the rain where it remained. He kissed around her mouth, tasted the mixture of salt and sugar, before delving his tongue inside gently. There was a sharp intake of breath, in unison, like they were both alive for the very first time. Her hands found his neck and they were ice cold.

     “You’re freezing, little lady,” he pulled away to grasp her fingers with a serious yet placid look on his face. “You’ll catch a cold…let’s get you out of these clothes.”

     He had carried her into his chambers, like a doll. He dried her hair. Pulled her from her wet robes and kissed every inch of her soft skin, as he had thought of doing since he met her. She had said his name over and over, smiled for him in the haze of pleasured bliss they shared. He craved that smile of hers. And as he held her hands still icy from the rain, he promised he’d never let anything take that warmth from her again.

     Yet here he was, unable to get the images from his mind as he sat on the roof above the room she shared with Yukimura. His jaw was clenched tightly as he looked towards the sun-kissed horizon and thought of them— _together_. Thought of him disrobing her, touching her and knowing her in the most intimate of ways. Thought of him pulling her bottom lip, which resembled a rose petal, into his mouth while she lay underneath him. He wasn’t as controlled as Saizo was. He’d be rough with her, sometimes, Saizo was sure of it. He’d lose control. The little lord had a dam of emotions and passion just waiting to breach through. He couldn’t possibly make her happy, could he? Saizo thought. Yukimura couldn’t read her as well as he could. The way her eyes creased just slightly in the corners when she was upset or lost in thought. Or the rare expression of wonder when she was up high in a tree looking over the land and the splotchy colors of autumn dotted like the spots of a koi fish.

     Like a fool, he let himself into the room in the quietest way he knew how. Every nerve in his body screamed for him to leave, his own mind told him to get out, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. For a while he just watched her there on the futon. She was simple. She was beautiful, reading quietly as she lay in her night robes. Cooly, she licked her finger to turn the page.

     “Must be interesting,” he finally spoke, relishing in the way she startled at his voice.

     “Saizo…” she huffed before snapping the pages shut. “What are you doing here?”

     “I’m not here.”

     He moved her stray hair to the side, planting sweet kisses on her neck and breathing in her scent. Practiced hands traced along her thighs before slipping underneath the robe and to the sweet spot between her legs.

     “Yukimura will be back from training any minute,” she protested, but her body arched closer to his own with want and it only urged his ministrations.

     “Will he now?” he grinned against the bare skin of her chest, being careful not to leave a mark.

     He hated how much he wanted this, wanted her. How intense he craved her closeness and the feel of her unraveling completely from his simple touch. He hated how whole he felt when around her, it only served to highlight his complete empty sadness when not. She clung to his robes like a lifeline, her fingers digging in like tree roots into the earth, and he palmed her clit with the rhythm of his fingers, her hips rolling in desperation. She had this beautiful way of begging him for more. How he wanted to be the only one to see her like this, feel her muscles tense and that soft coo when she finally came. Saizo brought his fingers to his lips while she adjusted her clothing.

     “Saizo, we can’t.” There was a thickness in her voice that had him feeling particularly sick.

     So this was it, he thought. He had pushed it too far. Pushed _her_  too far.

     “I have to marry him,” she continued. “He’s so…good. And I feel so— _rotten_. When we’re together. You and I.”

     It was true. Saizo felt rotten in a way he never had before. This was different than any ill-doing that had preceded in this life.  _The betrayal of his only friend_. Strange, when he thought of how easily he found it to spill another person's blood and watch the life drain from their eyes, their bodies becoming a limp hallow shell, like a sack of rice slowly emptied of its contents. But what he thought the most despicable of all was the fact that he would do it over again, if it meant being with her.

     “Do you now,” he asked with a tilt of his head. He could hear the familiar heavy footsteps approaching from down the corridor, so he stood to take his leave.

     “I’m serious,” she sat up, her determined gaze fixed on him in a way that had his muscles stiffening. “Never again. We can’t do this.”

     “ _Do what now,_  little lady?”

     She sighed at his coyness, and in a blink he had disappeared, like smoke being carried away in a stiff breeze. Though, when she reached into her hair she noticed the absence of the pin Yukimura had gifted her.

     From a distance Saizo watched Yukimura enter the room and close the door behind himself before tossing the pin into the dirt beneath the tree with a self-deprecating chuckle. Never again, he thought. They had said it many times before.  _Never again_. And as usual, nothing ever had him so scared as the thought that this time she might actually mean it.


End file.
